Satire

The Reason Medium Views Are Down

You can’t fool us

Alexander Razin
2 min readApr 1, 2021

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Grabbing my brick, know as my phone, I open Medium to see what’s the latest. As of late, Medium is experiencing low viewership. Many top writers say our writing quality is low, but many of us write like Ernest Hemingway times ten!

So it isn’t the quality? What is it, then? A particular writer has been deceiving us all, and I found the corporate in plain sight.

I set my phone down and headed to the kitchen to get water. My family were all in the kitchen, so out of the blue, I said,

“Right now on Medium, writers' views are low.”

“It is because I’m taking them all,” my brother said

“Writing what?” I asked him.

“Erotica,” he casually said as his brown eyes dilated

“Your getting 50 thousand claps, and millions of views then?”

“Yes, and Medium can’t do anything.”

“It makes sense, and sex stories are popular on medium,” I said, and as I walked away as promptly as I could to write the truth so all may see.

I asked my brother for his Medium account, and he told me it’s only for a prestigious group of writers and told me to get lost. Damn kid, I thought, and left without a word.

You can try to get into his account, but it only exists to those he sees as fit. I guess I need to improve my writing chops, so I make takedown his account and restore the balance. Until then, the views would remain down.

Author’s Note: Happy April Fools' Day, everyone. Have fun fooling your friends. Don’t worry about the views; as one of the top writer said: “Write to learn, not to make money.”

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Alexander Razin

Aficionado and connoisseur of obscure and experimental music, movies, and TV. Fictional and nonfictional pieces have their place here, too