SATIRE
African General Butt Naked: Eater of Children Marches On Once Again
Exposed and fierce, they strike
If you thought Kony 2012 was awful, it doesn’t compare to what Warlord General Butt Naked did. His actions made Kony look like a recital in comparison.
Butt Naked’s story is hard to swallow, but all these things happened. Here is Butt Naked’s true story.
Raised in the African military, young Butt Naked learns the ways of the militia. The Militia's top skills were black magic and child sacrifice. They taught feeble Butt Naked the ways of the dark arts. The soldiers were impressed by young Butt Naked's prowess; they knew that one day he would lead.
Young Butt Naked proved his worth when his commanding officer staged a coup to overthrow the president. Then, using black magic spells, the guerrillas placed the militia-friendly person as president.
Through every hardship, Butt Naked secured a spot in the rebel organization, and he led his soldiers on a path of victory, but at a price: they had to do it nude.
General Butt Naked and his crew fought side-by-side nude. Their tactic seemed crude, but they could easily capture children and make their enemies squirm. Not only did they fight bare-assed, Butt Naked and his…
