SATIRE

Don’t write many listicles

Photo from Let’s Make a Room.

It’s early dawn as I sit at my desk thinking of ideas to write articles about. As I pondered, the bird sang their morning ballad, and a neighbor weed whacked three blocks away. I sat there conquering up what on earth to write? A

When the lightbulb struck, I aimed my pencil to the notebook paper to write a viral hit when the ground rumbled. At first, I assumed it was an earthquake, and I attempted to ignore it; no one would stop me…


There’s poison in the water, and we deserve it

Album art. Photo from Spotify.

Since their inception in the 2010s, the U.K.-based alt-rockers have produced three albums driven by pragmatic instrumentation, distinguishable vocal inflections, and Pop/R&B hooks. The band comprises Conor Mason (lead vocals, and guitars), Joe Langridge-Brown (guitars, and backing vocals), Dominic Craik (guitars, keyboard, piano, and backing vocals), Philip Blake (bass guitar), and James Price (drums, and drum machine).

Conor Mason is one of the most notable frontmen in the rock genre for his stark and poignant baritone vocal melodies and harmonies.

Nothing But Thieves latest effort, follows the structure of their third album, : an album that…


RIFF SUMMER CHALLENGE

The rawer the better

Photo from the back art of Willoughby’s Beach.

Rock music went through a fascinating period in the ‘10s. Many indie bands like Neon Trees and Gotye dominated the charts. Showing rock music of this caliber is still prominent and can address the masses. One band’s humble beginnings didn’t appeal to most casual rock listeners but proved their proficiency in the subsequent years. The band in question is King Gizzard & The Wizard Lizard, and their second and third fuzzy fast-paced freakout albums can uplift any wild beach party or dance while other beachgoers doubt your sanity.

King Gizzard’s first foray of noise is their second EP,


Lessons no college can teach you

Photo by Thibault Luycx from Pexels

I knew I’ll get fired from my position. Two weeks ago, the temp agency told me that the factory no longer required my services. It didn’t shock me as I realized being laid off as a COVID-19 sanitizer for a plant for ten grueling months isn’t permanent. Yet, if it wasn’t for the monotonous job, I’ll never learn how to improve my health and life. Those ten of months taught me three important lessons I hope can help you out as well.

My reasons for working the factory job

I never worked in a factory before. However, it didn’t stop me from locating a career; no matter…


Meet the first proto Heavy Metal band

Photo from Ultimateclassicrock.

Among music enthusiasts and critics alike, it’s debated who’s the first heavy metal band. Many metal fans would point toward the bat-eating Brits of Black Sabbath, but what if I told you a trio of outcasts from the golden city of San Francisco, California predates Black Sabbath? The band is none other than Blue Cheer: three young adults with glorious manes who loved to play a boisterous rendition of rock-and-roll, or as udiscovermusic put it:

They were the bellowing Gods Of F**k.

Their noise was so loud and vast, they became the precursor to the genre, and the formation of…


Sports need branding too

Photo from News Wwc.

It’s early December in the late 90s, and my parents ask three or five-year-old me what I want for Christmas.

!” I shouted as I wiggled around with the energy a chubby little kid can muster.

I can’t say for sure if my folks purchased the classic 1996 for me on Christmas, but I have the physical VHS copy in my filmography that I binged watch ad nauseam as a kid. I viewed it holding my Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck plush toys (I still have them) tightly as I saw for a trillionth time…


An enriching bite that’s part of every complete breakfast

Photo from Magic Spoon.

As we get older, our bodies react in negative ways to what we consume. All the candy, soda, juice, or other processed foods eaten eventually catch up to you, making you feel dreadful. Instantly, your body would start telling you to give it nutrients, or it will shut down. The days are over when you can stuff your mouth with skittles while chugging a two-liter soda. Of course, you still can, but your body wouldn’t agree.

Regardless, one processed food many of us haven’t cut out is cereal. Sophie Diego on Honest Brand Reviews said a United States citizen eats…


Stephen Hillenburg is looking from above with shame?

Photo from CBR.

A massive sensation swept through the nation and left everyone bowing to their feet. People bowed down to one who’s rectangular, wore an odd combination of pants, shirt, tie, and that smile; that damn smile. They became the answers unknown to humankind, the reason we are here. This being is none other than , the lovable nautical sponge entertaining three generations' worth of children.

The cartoon is going strong after 22 years of syndication from Nickelodeon. For Nickelodeon, became their magnum opus; Nickelodeons’ own Simpsons.

Besides the best wishes of the late creator of , Stephen…


RIFF SUMMER CHALLENGE

Aggression fueling a solitary teenager

Image from Detroit Metro Times.

I can’t believe how naive I was in 2012 in high school when I told my Texas high school friend Josh that I was not too fond of Punk-Rock. Later in life, if I appreciated its sub-genre, Post-Hardcore, how could I not love Hardcore Punk?

When Josh grasped what I said, he had a deep stare of desperation on his face; his very essence left his body. Regardless, he pretended to gloss over the comment and continue his art class project. I’m not sure exactly what we were working on in my tenth-grade art class, but it must’ve been cool…


They know how to sweep you off your feet

Image by shbs from Pixabay

It’s early December 2015 in Santa Ana, California, as I eagerly wait outside The Observatory concert hall to meet one of my favorite post-hardcore bands, Dance Gavin Dance. As I wait, the pungent scent of cigarettes and vape pens waft the air and caresses my nostrils, inviting me to partake. I have no desire to smoke; the second hand is enough, thank you.

Soon I hear the thumping of Dance Gavin Dance’s brash instrumentation. They were practicing on the tracks from their new album, “Stroke God, Millionaire,” from I swayed my head to the charging sound of the…

Alexander Briseño

I’m a guy whose head is full of music info, pop culture, and book jargon unhelpful in getting a job, so I write about it. Website: https://ablatinwordy.wixsite.

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